Thursday, March 29, 2007

Top Five Reasons to Wrap Your Tool

5. Improve Your Sexual Longevity - Condoms traditionally decrease sensitivity. By wearing a condom you might finally be able to last long enough that your partner actually gets some enjoyment out of it!

4. No Babies - Lets face it. Babies are a pain, abortions are expensive, and I don't know about you but I'm not gonna count on luck to stop me from getting a chick pregnant.

3. Preservation - Remember when your grand parents put plastic on the furniture to keep it nice for when special guests came over? It's like that, just for your tool.

2. Pride - Nothing emphasizes your glory like taking a full scum bag and smacking it across your woman's face.

1. Avoid That "Burning" Feeling - No one likes an oozy tool. And you don't want to risk it and find out what they really mean by, "An intense burning sensation." Don't be a fool, wrap your tool.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Dont be silly, wrap your willy!

Bluepotpie said...

HAHAHAHA, another reason, you're last name is Bush, Lamport, Loving, etc. J/K. lol.

Anonymous said...

Well we all know about your longevity Mikey... Good conversation.


aLex Luthor